Wednesday, December 5, 2012

John Travolta's Hair

I got a text message from my sister today, telling me that she just saw John Travolta on The Ellen Show. She said his hair looked like her Ken doll. Exactly! That’s what I’ve been thinking too. WTF? People age, I get that. He doesn’t get hair like that due to the aging process though. There is no explanation for it. I’ve seen that bald spot patch stuff that comes in a spray can. Maybe John used the patten leather or vinyl version. It’s truly the weirdest hairstyle I’ve seen, and that includes mullets and mohawks. Mickey’s Ken doll had a little fuzz to his hair that eventually wore off. It never occurred to us to just paint it back on, ala Travolta. My Barbie had the first non-ponytail hairdo. It was a 1960’s bubble hairstyle and blonde, of course. Her hair wasn’t stylable, so wasn’t much fun. I never bonded with my Barbie. Her permanent high heel feet annoyed me. Mickey’s Ken doll was very boring, stiff, and flat-footed... the opposite of his lady love’s bumps and curves. I had one doll that had awesome hair. Her name was Poor Pitiful Pearl and she was a homely little thing. Her dress had patches on it and she had no shoes. The one thing she had going for her was very thick, luscious hair. I’m not sure that was what her creators were going for. I’m pretty sure you were supposed to feel sorry for her. A guilt trip in doll form! That was seriously a twisted idea for a toy, but one I could totally relate to (Catholic guilt runs bone deep). My Chatty Cathy doll was also blonde like Barbie. I kind of ignored grooming her though, due to the fact that she talked. I couldn’t wait for Christmas the year I got her. Then, once I heard what she had to say, I was bored. I thought more interesting things would come out of her mouth than “I love you”, “I’m hungry”, “I’m sleepy”. She had teeth too, which I’ve always found creepy. I had many dolls throughout my childhood. None of them, including my Trolls had the weird, painted on Travolta hair. With Christmas around the corner, I think he should ask Santa for a little follicle miracle. Or maybe a nice hat.

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