Friday, May 3, 2013

What's That Bright Object In The Sky?

Today was a very sunny Friday, and the warmest day of the year so far. On my way home from work, traffic was CRAZY! Leaving work at 2:30pm, I usually have a nice commute. Most people are heading in the opposite direction, so barring any accidents, I usually have no problems. Today, though, was different. I think the big, shiny object in the sky had bewitched everyone, and not in a good way. I believe all of Seattle was in their cars at 2:30 today. The commute had a kind of bumper car feel to it. Everyone had to pay attention to the road in order to avoid a Friday afternoon traffic armageddon. On any given day, Seattle traffic is heinous. I took the Underground Seattle tour years ago. I can’t remember how many founding fathers there were, but each picked his own area and mapped out his streets. This is why Seattle streets are laid out in an incongruent way. No wonder we have the Mercer Mess. On days when the sun comes out, the goofy streets become a free-for-all. It reminds me of the movie “The Time Machine”. In that movie, people thousands of years into the future have become the food source for the Morlocks, blue-skinned cannibals who live underground. Seattlites are better looking and better behaved than the Morlocks. Except when they drive. OK, this isn’t a good comparison. But how often do you get to talk about underground, blue cannibals? I wonder what will happen once the giant tunnel borer, Big Bertha, starts to dig the tunnel that will replace the Alaskan Way Viaduct. I am dreading that. Where are 100,000 cars going to go? More importantly, where is my car supposed to go? And what happens if the sun comes out? It won’t be pretty.

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