Thursday, May 29, 2014
Be Nice And Bend
Yesterday marked eight weeks since my knee replacement surgery. I still haven’t returned to work. I spend my days sitting on a chair and forcing my knee to bend. When that gets too painful, I get on my little stationary bike and ride for fifteen minutes. I also take the dogs on their afternoon walk around the block, as well as a short walk to my neighborhood coffee shop. I’m on a mission, as I have to be much improved when I see my doctor in a few days. Yesterday also marked the first time in eight weeks that I was able to drive. The last time I tried to sit in my Mini Cooper, I couldn’t bend my knee enough to get in. I tried again yesterday, and... no problemo! It’s a little dicey getting out, but at this point I don’t care how contorted and weird I look. Success is success. I was still sort of jazzed this morning, and was ready to drive to my favorite coffee shop. I was in my dining room, getting my wallet and keys. I turned to head out and stepped on something squishy. Half a second into mid-goosh, I knew my foot was coming down on a major pile o’ pooh. Ick! I guess my smeller hadn’t been working, because I never saw the pooh coming. I screamed, as I was truly surprised. In my mind, that phantom marauding elephant tunneled into my house with a sharpened spoon and took a giant dump in my dining room. Ok, I know that’s not rational. I’m sure it was my thirteen year old Scottie, Lucy. Rick took the dogs for a walk this morning. Lucy peed and then made a beeline back to the house. I’m the only one mean enough to drag her when she doesn’t want to go for walkies. Basically, EVERY walk is a drag. It’s no exercise for me. It’s a few steps, then stand and wait while Lucy sniffs every blade of grass. Her eyesight isn’t good, but her nose is in excellent condition. My theory is that Lucy needs to smell every square inch of the neighborhood to compensate for her lack of sight and sound. Great for her...but annoying as hell for the walker. It could take a half hour to go around the block. Not with me in charge though, being the Mean One, even with my bum knee. Hmmm... maybe the giant pooh was payback. Perhaps I’d better work on getting nicer as well as bendier.