Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Cupid Is Sad

It’s three days before Valentine’s Day and there has, unfortunately, been a sad love-related announcement. Charles Manson, infamous serial killer and all-around nutball and his fiancé, Star, will not be marrying. What went wrong? They had so much in common. OK, there was a 54 year age difference. Also, Charles would NEVER be let out of prison and wouldn’t be allowed conjugal visits. But hey, they were both technically human beings. Technically. Star had been hanging out around the prison and nurturing her relationship with Charles since she was seventeen. Now it turns out her “love” was merely a long range money-making scheme. Star wanted to marry Charles Manson so she could take possession of his body when he dies. Then she and her friends were going to place the body on display in a glass coffin and charge admission. BINGO... instant fortune! This girl is seriously twisted, and therefore, a perfect match for Charlie. Perfect. I’ve always admired people with long range goals. It takes such determination and self control to stick with a plan. In the case of Star, though, my admiration just isn’t there. She is one scary biatch. Imagine being her parents. I wonder which thing makes them shudder more - the fact that their daughter wanted to marry a serial killer, or the crazy reason for her engagement. Did she have a lemonade stand as a child? Sell Girl Scout cookies? Maybe she is just acting out because she wasn’t encouraged as a child to earn money. Then again, I didn’t EVER sell stuff as a child, nor did I earn an allowance. I can’t remember the last serial killer I was engaged to. So much for that theory. Maybe bad, twisted people just come out that way. I think Cupid is off the hook for this one.

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