Sunday, February 15, 2015
Jesus Is Calling
I have spent the last ten days down with some kind of respiratory virus. I missed six days of work, and haven’t been able to do much more than sit on my couch and not speak. It’s a good thing I love watching TV, because that’s basically what I’ve been doing 24/7. Today, it finally got to me. I didn’t feel like having noise in my head. I sat on my couch and read a book (OK, still sitting but at least my brain was firing). It was a lovely day outside, cold but clear skies. I’m not sure where all the people were, but my street was very quiet. I totally enjoyed the serenity. Go figure. About an hour into my solitude, my house phone rang. I checked the Caller ID, and lo and behold, Jesus Christ was calling. No kidding... that’s what it said. I didn’t answer, maybe wanting to tempt fate and see if I’d get smote (Or is it smoted? Smited? Smitten?). I ran with the phone to where I had paper and pen and copied the phone number down before the ringing stopped. Wow, I had the cell number to the Son of God. How cool was that? I got on my laptop and Googled the phone number. It came back as coming from Van Nuys, CA. Jesus was calling from southern California. Was he a surfer, or perhaps a movie executive? Maybe he’s that guy in lederhosen running the Matterhorn ride at Disneyland. Hmmm. Comments online said these calls were a scam. Some had received a voicemail that said for only $250 you could hear the truth about Jesus. Is nothing free anymore??? I began to ponder whether I had received a scammy call or a divine one. Perhaps JC was disturbed that my TV was off and was just calling to check on my wellbeing. I suppose he could have been wondering why he hasn’t seen me around a church in oh, let me see, what day is this...40 years? Being a supreme being and all, I think he’s probably figured that one out. Perhaps he was calling for my husband, and not me after all. That makes more sense. I went back to my murder mystery and decided to let the other mystery slide.