Thursday, July 4, 2013
Don't Needle Me
About eight years ago I tried acupuncture to relieve pain in my knees. I’d had three knee surgeries, and ended up with osteoarthritis. I detest needles. Hate them. They are right up there with spiders. Eeuuwww, ick! Only a big, hairy spider armed with a hypodermic needle would be worse. But hey, I thought it might be worth it to solve my moderate pain. It didn’t work, but I gave it a valiant try... eleven times. The first acupuncturist was a nice lady who told me that she got into the field because it just made sense to her. It made absolutely NO sense to me, which is probably why it didn’t work. You poke a needle in my face to fix my knee pain? Isn’t that sort of in the wrong neighborhood??? The woman started out with a needle right in the tippy top of my head. That totally freaked me out, but I somehow held it together. I played it cool, like I was totally OK with someone harpooning me in the head. No biggie on the outside, but inside I was screaming “WTF???”. I think I had five sessions with her, then she passed me on to her boss who had years more experience. The second acupuncturist tried many different techniques over six sessions. Some needles hurt only a little, and others hurt like hell. I think I deserve a tee ball trophy or major award for giving acupuncture a go. I’m not sure I’d try it now. My needle phobia has gotten worse, plus I seem to be more sensitive than ever. I’m currently doing physical therapy for shoulder pain. I’m not sure if it could be fixed with a cortisone shot, but that’s not an option. I prefer to suffer rather than face a needle. Silly maybe, but that’s how I roll.