Tuesday, October 29, 2013


I have been having a small problem with sugar ants in my kitchen. I haven’t been able to find their entrance from the outside, but am constantly on the lookout for them. The other night, I moved a sponge that had been sitting on the kitchen counter. An earwig scurried out... Yikes! It startled me because I was on sugar ant alert, not Disgusting Bug With Pinchers On Its Butt alert. I brushed the earwig into the sink and turned on the water. He got to the edge of the drain, and held on... and on. Do earwigs have tiny suction cups somewhere on their undercarriage? Whatever the case, he wouldn’t go down the drain. It took the sprayer practically placed on his head to send him away. Sometime the next evening, I noticed there was something dark in the dog’s water dish. I meant to clean it out, but forgot about it. The next morning, I emptied the water dish and realized the dark item was an earwig. And it was alive. Seriously! It must have been in the water for hours. It had to be the same hearty earwig that I thought was playing a harp in Disgusting Bug Heaven. This guy was tenacious, truly amazing, and possibly equipped with a snorkel. And given the fact that I’d tried to kill him twice, I was in for the Pinch To End All Pinches if he was not dispatched for good. I really try to love all creatures, but have my limits. Sharks and spiders are on my exception list, as are earwigs. I’m not sure if they actually pinch, but it seems like they are fully capable. I hate to admit it, but I unleashed the full strength of my handy bottle of 409 Spray. Still, the earwig would not give up. Finally, the toxins took hold and he went down the drain. For good, I hope. It being almost Halloween, though, it makes me wonder. What if this earwig was some kind of undead zombie bug? What if the 409 caused a mutation, and he comes back again? I might want to scrutinize the trick or treaters, and look for any telltale signs of a pincher. This guy was relentless, and if he comes back, he’s going to be pissed!

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